satonmybutt

Why us?

Well I don’t need to tell those of you that read my blog regularly that I’m in pain, its now become a way of life and at the moment I’m having a beast of a flare up. My hands are stiff, my shoulders are so painful and my legs are as usual trying to push me over the pain threshold edge.

I have always said that I will take all the pain that can be thrown my way, but that’s as long as my wife and daughters are okay, however that hasn’t been the case.
My wife has been having hip problems and pain in her shoulders and she’s always had stiff hands, recent tests have shown that she has Rheumatoid Arthritis! I’m so bloody angry, I hate the thought of her having to deal with this, I have spoken to many people who have RA or who care for someone with RA and I’m a mix of angry and upset!

I always feel bad that she has to care for me, I hate having to just sit and watch as she cuts the lawn in our garden (it’s big) and when she takes my wheelchair and loads it into the car. I want to take care of her and as the man of the house, I should be doing the heavier jobs, it really is one of the hardest parts of being like this.

So now I’m thinking about how I can help, I had previously refused Spinal cord stimulation as I’m not totally happy with having the procedure and I have read about people having problems. I’m now wondering if I should have it because I need to try and be of as much use as possible and at the moment I’m a burden.

So not a long blog, I just needed to vent

3 thoughts on “Why us?”

  1. Hey… I have CRPS quite thoroughly and recently my husband has been suffering back problems. I know just what you mean, but from a wife point of view. I feel I should be caring for him more as he struggles with this, and I know that the extra pressure he feels as the working and earning adult means that he knows it’s all on him. I hate that. I should be earning too and it shouldn’t be a disaster if he’s ill or has a long term condition. I don’t have any rights to that position in our family! I’m trying to support him but just can’t do what he needs most, which is to take the pressure off him financially. Life is a real struggle at times, and we all just do the best we can. Remember that if things had been the other way around, you would have cared for her as she has cared for you. You didn’t choose this, it just happened. Try not to feel guilty… I hope things work out, and that you can both adjust to whatever your life holds. I’m sure you will. I will try too 🙂

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