I have been with my wife Donna for 29 years, my eldest daughter is 26 and my youngest 24.
So I have been outnumbered for a lot of years!
This has meant that I have endured girly chat but I have also watched more than my fair share of girly films!
This means that I can quote Mean Girls, I can understand a conversation about The Hot Chick and I know that John Tucker Must Die!
My youngest daughter has now left home and started her own family but still when I suggest a film night, I am out numbered.
Now don’t get me wrong, I am okay with watching some of these films and that should have been SOME in caps.
Because I have self harmed whilst having to endure Mama Mia 1 and 2 and I have had to suffer 50 Shades of Grey.
I don’t really have to write a blog post right now but I am, I am busily tapping away on the keyboard to keep my sanity as I have been outvoted yet again and they are watching Book Club.
Now I wouldn’t mind but it is the same old crap, it is predictable, over the top and whoops oh my a double entendre “giggle”. Naughty. Yawn!
I am a 51 year old man and grumpy, I like explosions, superheroes, car chases, guns and lots and lots of violence and when I say violence, I am not talking about Pierce Brosnan mudering an Abba song, again!
But no, tonight it is older women being oh so naughty, saying naughty things and more double entendres than an old Carry On film, give me a break and yes even a broken bone if it gets me out of this.
I remember (damn I sound old) when a films would come out at a trickle, but it seems that the dam has burst and we are now swamped and somehow a sewage pipe burst as well.
I mean quantity does not mean quality as most guys will know by the 4th shag in one night and I am also currently left feeling very sore and the finish is taking way way too long!
Oh no I am serious, please someone help me. Maybe a lobotomy or a small coma might be helpful about now!