Lump on my boys?

On Saturday night when we went to bed, I checked my testicles for any lumps. I admit that that it’s been quite a while since I last checked, this has been down to the fact that I have been feeling very low (no pun intended) because of the pain and my even poorer health.
The strange thing is that I checked because I’m growing a beard, I know sounds mad, I have had no interest in anything because of low mood, constant pain 24/7 wears you down. But a few weeks ago I decided to stop shaving until the clocks go forward next year, after several weeks I now have a decent full beard and I have started to take more interest in my personal hygiene (not that I was stinky), daily beard grooming and taking a daily photo to show the growth has given me some interest (damn this sounds pathetic as I type it), I realise how bad my life has become when growing a beard is interesting.

So anyway, I check and I find a lump on leftie, I think my words were “oh crap”, a sudden feeling of dread swept over me and I immediately imagine the worst case scenario. Of course it had to be the weekend and so I have to wait to see a doc, but it’s now Monday morning and I’m booked in to see my GP at 11am.

Yesterday my mood was low and my family commented on how miserable I was, but I can’t stop thinking that this could be the worst kind of lump, cancer!
I have always had a real fear of cancer, obviously everyone does but a couple of family members had cancer when I was very young and I remember saying to my wife when we first together that my family don’t often make old age. This of course isn’t actually 100% true, its just how it felt when I was young, now we have several oldies in the family, but I’m still convinced that I won’t make it beyond my sixties.

So now it’s a waiting game, I will see the GP today and he will refer me to a specialist, this all takes time and meanwhile I will have convinced myself that it’s definitely cancer.

6 thoughts on “Lump on my boys?”

  1. Trying to look on the bright side, thank goodness something made you check and you have found it. Good luck, hope the wait isn’t too long and the news is goo

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